batman tramp stamp. Dibs.
i just heard her through the wall saying "not on my face! NOT on my face!" then a scream and "I SAID NOT ON MY FACE!!!"...nice work dude.
I asked her if she was the outdoorsy type, she replied "I had sex on a fourwheeler once, does that count?"
keep an eye on me. i'm afraid that after a few more drinks i'll ask to borrow his wheelchair.
He looks like he has a penis
What the fuck
A good one, a good penis
well i did drunkenly flip his snowmobile going 90, so i can kind of see why hes mad
The strip club called, they have your shoe.
But apparently I got kicked in the head by a stripper at some point
Just got caught staring at a woman breast feeding. My only response was, "She's so adorable".
Breathalizer & tazer party did not go as casually as expected.
NO SHITSVILLE I just saw a homeless dude punch a pigeon that flew by him
I just want a man to crawl into my bed with me and never crawl out. Anti socialism at his best.
I wore my Gollum shirt. It struck up a conversation AND got him staring at my boobs. That's a win-win.
there's crying, and people are upset, and there's a love triangle, and a broken heart, and so much estrogen
I love when Facebook suggests people I may know. Well, yeah, I know him. He's my drug dealer. Pretty sure I want to keep that relationship strictly professional.
Randomize
