there are 2 things i love giving: blowjobs & backrubs. how can i tell them that without sounding like a slut
Its trashy in the best of ways. Like a stripper working to pay for college.
I truly don't know anything about sober relationships. Normally I would just drunkenly yell "sex?" in a guy's face. What do I do now? Be like, sooo uhhh, wanna do it? Awkward, and even worse, I will remember clearly just how awkward it was.
What's the big deal? you guys fuck
3 times is my limit. I don't even want to know you exist after 3 times
He looks like the kind of guy that would jack off to weird things.
you just stood there spinning and got mad if anyone tried to stop you
we just finished a porn and sex toy shopping spree. this is the fun part of "being serious"
That's the international "my vagina is unoccupied, come talk to us" chant. You have your mission. Go.
College is a time for personal growth. Meaning it's time to start using those pickup lines on randos at dive bars.
It was his first time doing shrooms and we made him ride in the truck bed. But he kept standing up and yelling when we stopped so we had to keep driving
The token old dude at the show tried hitting on us by telling us his favorite rapper was Cayenne West.
he stopped talking to me, quit his job, moved out of the province and then told me it was "no big" when I called him apologizing...
We're the worst. Two people without their shit together do not make a functional adult.
Just paid my weed guy with a check. I've got this whole adult thing down.
You know that panicky moment when you go home with a guy and realize you’ve been there before?!? HAPPENING RIGHT NOW!!!
Turns out I banged his son a few months ago but the kids back at college so I don’t have to worry about him walking in while Dad has me bent over the couch
Randomize
