Midgets have it so easy. They have so much less leg area to shave.
I am going to be the most sexually active ladybug that he has ever seen
not exactly restoring sanity, but he is throwing up on the national mall right now
I am moving slowly w him. I havent even masturbated to him yet.
There are cops on horseback in our back yard
Court can wait. right now you and your magic penis need to be here satisfying me.
Between my sister puke and rallying at the bar and my brother sending a drunk passed out naked pic in which his dick was exposed, I don't know which sibling to be more proud of this weekend.
Yeah, he's passed out in my bathroom pantsless. Is it a faux pas to look at his penis?
My night can be summed up in 3 words: Vodka. Threesomes. Hospital.
They are doing the auction. One of the items in the auction is a grenade launcher.
You mowed a straight line through three yards because you were, and I fucking quote, "In the zone." I think they know.
also. got fucked to usher last night. dunno if thats a new high or a new low
Was it at least a good usher song?
That jawline could fucking have its way with me.
Currently standing at the bus stop in just a pillowcase and its fucking snowing
It’s only loud for those who wanna get loud. The bowlers are protected.
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