Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(502): View more from Kentucky

I'm at work and it's 1:30. I need a beer. is that bad?

(1-502): View more from Kentucky

Welcome to every minute of my life.

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(586): View more from Michigan

he fingered me, smelled his fingers, then asked me what i ate today..

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(805): View more from California

I'm blazed at jack in the box and my order number is 420. I wish everything in the world made this much sense.

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(636): View more from Missouri

So Jesus turned water into wine. So what? I once turned a whole student loan into natty light. Your move holy man.

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23 Men Confess The Moment They Realized They Wanted A Divorce
Read it at the TFLN blog
(973): View more from New Jersey

all we did was drink wine and talk about how people who dont have facebook dont exist.

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(206): View more from Washington

tried unsuccessfully for 10 minutes to do bong hits while wearing glow in the dark vampire fangs before realizing air was getting out of the sides of my mouth

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(817): View more from Texas

idk if ive ever seen a picture of him on facebook with his pants on

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(503): View more from Oregon

Robert just walked in drunk, grabbed my Jameson from me, told me to let him do his thing, and spilled it all over the coffee table. Then he told me to grab a funnel because he was going home.

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(058): View more from

Okay, first we buy a pirate outfit and then we get drunk, you in or you out?

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