Just figured out why my bed smells like weed: I just found a bowl in my pillow case?
Just a heads up: The party is Fourth of July themed. Spread the word
dude its may
Work with me here, man.
It's not fair. Guys with dicks that huge should not be allowed to be catholic.
He just pushed one of his testicles up into his stomach and called himself lance armstrong. I can't make this shit up.
we got cut off at 8 am. He spilled his drink three times on the plane. this should be one hell of a vegas trip
I tried to sit on a barstool last night...it was an open trashcan.
I asked you if you needed a ride and you kept saying "no, my name is katelyn"
All I want is a guy who will love me and occasionally shave my balls.
There are five fire trucks here and needless to say my booty call left so come back home whenever you like
I can't help that I bring out the sex in people
Just passed the animal clinic parking lot I had to pull over to puke in during welcome week. I can almost hear the dogs barking at my shame again.
He may be engaged to someone else, but god damn that was the best 3 hours I've ever spent naked with someone.
I HATE HIM SO MUCH I HOPE HE GETS IN SOME WEIRD ACCIDENT WHICH MAKES IT IMPOSSIBLE FOR HIM TO NUT
So Saturday night after 10 drinks I guess he tried to have sex with me and in the middle of it I asked "can you tell I'm faking it!?" and then I sat up and threw up in my hand. That's a sex Win in my books
why is there a shopping cart in my back seat? and a dick drawn on the side of my car?
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