I smell stomach acid.
God is so good, I would give him a blow job right now.
I asked about his 3 inch scar on his chest. It's from when he had to castrate a bull on the estancia. Apparently this is how good bull meat is made.
dude uncooked spaghetti noodles dipped in thousand island dressing is better than it sounds
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I woke up naked on the bathroom floor. the tile grout marks on my boobs hurt, i mananged to use a roll toilet paper as a pillow. never again. did we eat salad?
considering how much of last night I don't remember and the amount of ones laying on my desk right now, it's safe to say I'm concerned
Wtf. I just got invited to a threeway bj session in the bathroom at boiler. Lmao
I feel like i just got chewed up and shit out by a ukranian midget
That's not your dick yours is smaller. Nice try.
Wait why do you have a pic of someone else's dick in your phone?
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After sex he cried I didn't know what to do so I patted him on the back and went to the kitchen to make waffles
Aka reading hardcore gay robot porn as a steady trickle of elementary schoolers walk by me every so often and im still in uniform as there councilor
Who is also still dressed up as a pirate
*tries to be fun and flirty* *literally gets peed on*
He just seemed to happy to be having sex with me that it ruined the mood for me. I just wanted to punch him.
i had to flash a cab last night.
did it work?
No. he slowed down but then kept going. story of my life.
Got electrocuted a second ago, is it weird that I have a boner?
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