Oh and I watched laurens last episode on the hills. its been an emotional day
Proposition. Sex. No words, no talking about it later. I just want you tonight.
On your way out, lock the front door. And by lock the front door, I mean find the door handle, reattach it, and then lock it.
I mean, I'm not looking for prince charming. I'm looking for the glass slipper of dicks.
Standing in a circle of girls fistpumping to the word "hospital" while taking shots.... I don't see this ending well, but its fucking fun.
Would you feed me pudding while my fake tan dries?
I FOUND THE NORMAL CONDOMS. THIS IS GOD TELLING ME TO CHASE AFTER MY DREAM.
He purred while eating me out. HE PURRED AND I LIKED IT.
My whole family just stopped to look at me and aknowledge how fucked up I am.
Can't keep a straight face around her after she asked me to "make fuck to her."
nana can keg stand better than me. should i be proud?
How many times have we said we'd stop taking Jell-O shots with strangers?
Do you want to go soon I'm overthinking life and my butthole again
You tried to prove you weren't drunk by loudly singing the romanian national anthem. Why the fuck do you even KNOW the romanian national anthem?
Doing the walk of shame from the back of a Jeep to the porta potty it's parked next to while your dad watches is not what you want.
Randomize
