I got otter pops to cool the beers, it's an all around better idea.
Is it sanitary to roast marshmallows over a cigarette lighter?
How many 'remember name' entries is it inappropriate to have in one's cell phone?
We got back together. The pastures weren't greener on the other side, the dicks were just smaller
I need to shotgun another beer. Where's the machete?
So feel off my bed lastnight into the trashcan. On the plus side i thought under my bed was a cave and i went exsploring
I wouldn't be too worried. He's been known to chase a chubby before.
THAT IS NOT HOW YOU TALK TO YOUR SISTER
Okay. This morning the comforter was wet, you were underwearless and using a tiny blanket. What'd you do??
I think once you know a guy's chest measurements the stalking has gone too far..
Well you know I have tits so that's half the battle
Just calling to thank you for not dying. I love you.
I just threw up a strange neon green substance. Did I eat a glow stick last night?
Accent: check. Hot body: check. 8" dick: check. Feeds me biscuits in bed after rampant sex: check. Should I continue with my "Why I'm not coming back to the States" List?
How did people get blow jobs before text messaging?
I kinda realized titty fucking is purely for our enjoyment, they dont really get much out of it, except for a guy sitting on them and and a dick bouncing of their chin
Randomize
