Do you think the new Crest Whitestrips Advance Seal would stay on while I give him head? It would be great to knock out 2 things at once...
Think about all of the events that have led to this: me sitting in the back of my classroom drinking beer out of a taco bell cup, telling the teacher I have to leave early to go to an AA meeting.
weed, chlorine, and victory. my bed smells like i had sex with michael phelps.
So when does "going out for one drink" = giving some guy an HJ on the sidewalk?!?
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I googled what to do, and it said to squeeze the pressure out so people are taking turns sitting on my head. I can't believe I'm allowing this
I can feel the alcohol in my calves
we've coined the Sunday morning ritual of taking out our puke-filled trash cans as The Trash Of Shame
For future reference "I'm too drunk to come today" is an acceptable line to get out of work. I love my job
Every time you started making out for him we all cheered for you... that's what sorority sisters do - they cheer you on when you make bad life decisions at the bar.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You were force feeding yourself jello and you kept repeating, "I will not surrender"
I had to rub one out before the Shabbat dinner in case I find a nice Jewish girl to fuck me in the bathroom.
Your mother would be so proud
The lady at walmart just said she is so happy im still alive....Was i that drunk on the 4th? Dont answer that
I'm happy in my shell. My shell which consists of keeping guys in the friend zone and me masturbating...
Regardless of how one feels after a break up, whiskey must be consumed.
Is it something I'm going to want to hug you for or slap you for?
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