About to do something stupid. You'll be my call. Bring bail money.
he puts the penis in happiness.
Just walk through the Honors dorm on a Saturday night. You'll feel better about yourself.
i'm glad we've gotten to the point in our relationship where I can eat peach rings off your penis.
my night ended in me puking all over jenna's bed, then me trying to wash the sheets in the toilet.
He said he forgot to take his shoes off, and that he was a bad boy because he was walking on the carpet. Then he sang. Then he shouted "I'M STILL FORGETTING."
I want a bunch of melted cheese. or a penis. or a penis covered in melted cheese
I wish him all the best and hope one day he can afford the surgery to remove his head from his ass
Champagne pong turned into an expensive and painful experience.
I would sacrifice a finger for two more hours of sleep.
do you think your dog feels awkward being in the background of your nudes?
I'm just impressed that you can puke without losing your gum
I had a sex dream about Fox Mulder, and the Royals just won the World Series. My life is complete.
I peed in Andys sink the other day bc I didnt want him to hear me pee
I took it as a sign from the lord above that she wanted me to creep on these men.
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