I had total buyers remorse when i finally got him naked. All that effort for a dude that hairy? Come on.
You know its going to be a good homecoming when you beer bong a mimosa at 6am.
Just saw a woman walking a golden retriever and a vacuum down the road. I miss downtown.
Oh you're gonna love this story. I almost cut off a little girl's pony tail.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It took me fifteen minutes to go from puking on my doorstep infront of my old lady neighbor to legit presentable person able to care for children. Bronzing powder and I deserve an award.
you peed off the balcony at your sisters and asked someone below to catch it with a cup
those kids just got delivered to the party by the pizza guy
i ended up eating cold sauceless spaghetti out of the container in the fridge with my hands.
Yeah we invited her back for chicken nugget sandwiches
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Pretty sure if we keep hanging out on Tuesdays there will be no whiskey left for the younger generations or the universe will implode....tomato tahmato
on a scale of one to ten where does vomming from being hungover during a professionalism lecture fit
He just told me I was beautiful, whilst I peed into a cup. If this isn't love I don't know what is.
I am NOT losing my v-card to a guy who doesn't know my ass from my elbow.
Woke up at 8am and asked if she had coffee.... She handed me a shot of tequila...
TSA doesn’t allow handcuffs in carryon bags. Super fun they confiscated them in front of my boss and coworker.
Randomize