Of course we end up in a gay bar... And I have to tell you there are some hot dudes here, should I pass around your Facebook?
I am going to fall madly in love with a ginger, marry the ginger and have lil ginger children running all around town. Oy
You shut your mouth
I can't wait til my little brother reaches the point where puking doesn't mean we stop drinking
and then he put stevie wonder on to fuck to...and hummed along as I blew him
My roommate made me a peanut butter and sprinkles sandwich. Maybe tonight isn't that bad
Stolen hampster on my tits. Don't tell me I don't know how to party.
Highlight of the night: paying my cell phone bill at the bar... I need to get laid.
Nothing says I'll be 22 tomorrow like washing the vomit out of your hair at 4pm
I just had some kinky fun in the back seat of my car behind a Ralph's in south county. How's your thanksgiving eve?
He pulled out a red and green condom and then started humming "Here Comes Santa Claus." Happy holidays indeed.
I just masturbated while watching Say Yes to the Dress
This is what my life has come to
When I got home he was in his underpants on the couch, eating pop tarts and crying while watching Voltron.
Every morning should start with 2 orgasms and a shoulder massage
it's like the easy bake oven version of plastic surgery
Matt is trying to convince me that we have a deal where if I show him my tits he won't do cocaine. Apparently we shook hands on it?
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