after last night, i judge her for not breaking up with me
Sex and the city 2 and twilight getting released in the same month. God hates mankind.
all i remember is stealing his cheesepuffs and shaving my vagina in the hotel lobby
Aren't you glad we're at the point in our relationship where I don't even ask why you're hiding in the cabinet?
the trail of clothing leading from the bed to the door was in the exact order i needed to put them on. underwear near the bed shoes by the door.
I started to trust fall random people on the dance floor
I'm not an expert but calling her the "hot lesbian" isn't going to coerce her into a 3some with you
all i remember was you yelling "look at my little feet" at everyone on the way home from the bar.
Omg. Some dude is jacking off in Kelly's bathroom.
He referred to our sex as being similar to "Two cheetahs cage fighting" and I have to agree.
You don't have to have sex with both if us but I would like a little positive fucking regard.
I'm pretty sure NORMAL roommates don't have to hide each others sex toys from their fuck buddies.
Saying I've had more balls in my mouth than you is the last clear, coherent thing I remember.
I am one with the molecules
Today will be the day I throw up in my backpack in the middle of class
Randomize
