So its not gay if you have sex with another woman and its academic
so what if I'm having sex with a woman for recreation?
Thats gay
And as you crawled into the bathroom last night you repeatedly said "I know the routine".
she would only give me a road handjob because she didnt want to unbuckle
safety first
Btw...pregnancy boobs are amazing. I don't recommend pregnancy in general but the boobs are good.
He acted like he was sleep fucking because I woke up to him screwing me in the middle of the night and he had is eyes closed and was mumbling things the whole time and wouldn't respond to me.
Is that even possible?
I called him by the wrong name to test him and he instantly stopped, rolled over and acted like he was still sleeping...I think he might break up with me tomorrow.
I want to play lord of the rings tonight. And by that I mean get really drunk, potentially lost, and go trekking through the woods or climbing shit. I want all of you there. You are the fellowship. This is a mass text. I am insanely high.
sex on the stairs. not our finest idea.
I tried getting kicked out of my favorite bar. No matter what I did, I could do no wrong
Watching Faye Reagan porn all weekend for St Patty's day. Nothing has ever seemed more appropriate.
how does spending your day off taking me to the hospital sound?
I'm so upset I left my sombrero at the expo center
OMFG. JUST WALKED IN ON A DUDE JERKING IT IN THE MCDONALDS BATHROOM
Stall or urinal?
I am in the parking lot of CVS in Auburn. I think a truck full of Plan B and regret just arrived.
Ya that dick wasn't worth burning a perfectly good pizza.
You live and learn.
If you can wrestle my underwear off of me, you can top. It'll be like using an amulet in Legends of the Hidden Temple. Instead of not getting captured, you don't get fucked in the ass.
Randomize
