Ok let me ask a question, does aderall make women less apt to have sex?
Cause it just destroys penises
Was that inappropriate? I can't gauge these things anymore
So I thought I was slick leaving his room this morning all incognito. Little did I know I was wearing his football jersey with his name across the back... stilettos & my bra was left behind. never seeing that again
arkansas has a gas station called kum and go....story of my life
Shark Week may as well be Shark Weed.
Wow, you know I need to stop drinking alone when I pour my drink into my hand and offer it to my dog,
im just gonna turn drinking alone on new years into a tradition
we decided to do a scavenge hunt for ourself for when we walked back to our apartments. We hid taco bell behind some bushes. I think they are still good.
I always forget that visiting my hometown is like a who's who of ugly people.
She who has the vag holds all the power. He will learn one way or the other.
to instagram or to not instagram the picture i took of when i shit in the urinal
We got to his house at 7am and two random guys were on the couch shot gunning beers saying we were late for the party
Decided I'm going to wear a shirt that says "I'm sorry" whenever we go back to that fraternity
This is the drunkest I've ever been at a chili's
I found a video on my phone from last night... You got up on the table at McDonald's and screamed BURRITOOO!
my god I love twenty year old dicks
Randomize
