Just wrote a paper about alcohol abuse that sounded like my weekend...
man i wonder what i would be like if i had never started smoking weed
let's get a trip to cabo together for next spring... they have to have forgotten about me by now
There is no way I'm taking advice from somone who's idea of a balanced diet consists of vodka and lemon detox juice
Had to go to the urgent for a physical and I gave them my fake. Nurse was a sport though
I'm FaceTiming Pizza Hut.
So what's going on?
We hit boys town to get stupid. I mean invading Iraq stupid.
I haven't received a dick pic from him lately. He's not even my boyfriend and I'm concerned. I hope he's alright.
I finally figured out how to tighten my bra straps and I feel like a god
YOU BETTER TOUCH MY NIPPLES TODAY
Whatever. I have his dick. Haha how many girls can say they have a dildo replica of a guy they were seeing
Well, I got drunk and told my family about what I expected sexually after a good first date.
You screamed out "happy birthday Jesus" followed by chugging Bacardi straight out the bottle
I just had all of the sex. All of it.
I can't come. It's so cold my uterine walls have frozen together like a cherry popsicle.
Randomize
