is it bad that i kinda- ok, reallyyy don't remember having sex with him last night?
I cant. I'm trying to smell my vagina.
he suggested i make a website called "cum on molly's face", to "start off my acting career"
Even if he doesn't call, at least I can say i fucked a mascot.
Nobody knew what to do when it was dead. You said fire up the George Foreman, I've never ate baby shark. She hasn't stopped crying.
Lost gin update. Blackout me found and re-hid the bottle. Left a note to myself saying, "GOOD LUCK, SUCKER!"
It's like....nice talking about real estate but your son gave me herpes
If it carries over into the weekend I would be glad to nurse your vagina back to health.
"Home for the holidays" isn't clearance to fuck the recently 18 year old high schooler right?
Nope, his last birthday was.
You know it's time to cut back when your unemployed drug dealer roommate tells you that you party too hard.
I had to find out that I peed in the box of baby clothes from my mom, who found out from my grandma. New low.
So I'm pretty sure I told every one at the party that "I'm going to fuck my pillow pets tonight?"
I was his one phone call from jail and I hung up on him. He's fine though were gonna go to a party now.
Molly was fun. I was in a captain planet onesie in Wal-Mart talking to everyone haha
What part of the grouping of the words "anal beads" confuses you?
Randomize
