jackpot. dress really slutty so he knows you mean business
Way too hungover to be taking this many family pictures
I think she's a little more wasted than usual. She just crawled on the floor to tell mom it was time to take a shot.
As long as you don't die I'm in full support of your drinking decisions
Jail wasn't bad. Was poppin Xanax the whole way there
So help me Jesus we're never drinking together again. But weekends don't count. Amen.
I have your shoes, your bike, and someones blue underwear. Round 2 tonight?
U should just post that picture of u two on facebook with the caption, does anyone know this girl? If so please tell her to take plan b, thanks
I just got checked out by a paramedic whilst their sirens were on. I'm doing something right
Ive never seen one person more proud of themselves of peeing in public and getting away with it.
but I truly enjoy making out with my best friend more than my boyfriend
On a scale of 1 to alcoholic in withdrawal how ready will you be to start drinking as soon as you arrive on campus?
Sorry I didn’t really get to say goodbye last night I was busy vomiting in your fathers front yard
I am confused/concerned about the circumstances that led to your consumption of 3 beta fish last night.
What happened?
Vodka. Vodka happened.
Randomize
