hi brent please bring bad word music cd must most bad word please brent bring cd music bad word please brent bring cd music bad word
My Mom bought me a vibrating toothbrush. Maybe this is her way of apologizing for throwing away my other thing that vibrated.
you are the weird ass hat to my lady gaga
she gave me a disgusted look and asked how i could live with myself. because i havent seen the rocky horror picture show. and then dumped me.
I froze in his sixty one degree room but i came so hard. Like fucking the eskimo god.
went from writing my paper to watching obamas speech to crushing beers and singing springsteen in a crowd of 100 within 20 minutes. I love this country
Thats gotta be it. Also just found out that the fireworks will fit in the airsoft pistols...we are all gonna die
Boobs speak an international language.
So she just had an emotional breakdown over a birthday card with a peacock on it. Yeah. She's pretty drunk, but we made it home safely.
I've justified worse with less. I had sex with your brother because he was wearing a nice sweater
So im waiting for someone at grand central and i look up AND THE ENTIRE BALCONY IS FILLED WITH BOY SCOUTS I AM TERRIFIED
So as a result of a tragic manscaping accident I've had to shave all the hair off of my legs. The result is... not great
Well the other day she asked me how often I jerk off. So I guess things are getting semi-serious
i'm drinking soco out of a mickey mouse cup right now. i love it when college and my childhood meet in the middle.
last night I mixed vodka in with my protein shake... and you tell me my new years resolution was impossible
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