Eric got herpes from Jo-ann
That's what he deserves for hooking up with a french canadian
Went home with a 29 year old from the bar. Life lesson: 9 year olds stay up late sometimes
God you better not be texting me after just having sex with someone from craigslist
the size of his penis is telling me NOOO! but his bank account is telling me YESSS!
just had to explain to the health center why i wanted 50 condoms a month.
My brother just asked if I would keep having one nighters with that guy because he really likes the organic cotton v-necks he leaves behind.
sleeping in bed with your booty calls married sister...you're the stuff heroes are made of.
I am wearing two different shoes and just swallowed my gum. Wake the fuck up and bang the bartender already.
By the end of the first quarter he was so hammered he was pouring beer into the crockpot with the miniature hot dogs and BBQ sauce saying he loved the supper bowl and he loves taking mini weinies to the face
Black out Jordan is making huge strides. I didn't even pee on anyone or anything last night.
My sheer presence has sent the hipsters running in terror. I expect no problems.
I accidentally flashed three cops last night. Stone cold sober.
Here when you come to your senses come back here and I'll fuck you back out of them.
we've dated a week and made out twice. he is taking it slow. but his body is stupid sexy. just want him to stop respecting me and fuck me like a gutter slut. respect me later im not getting younger.
Ever find a porn video so groundbreaking you mentally cancel all your Dick Appointments for the week?
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