My dad just knocked on my door and told me that my vibrator was too loud
I made $300 today by selling pizza @ $4 a slice to nerds who refuse to leave the library. God I love finals time
I'm scared at the amount of beastiality in this conversation.
ENDLESS SCROLLING ON TUMBLR WAS MADE FOR HIGH PEOPLE!
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
... there are chew marks on my license. I have no idea.
I expect to be treated like a lady. Even If your sticking it in my ass.
I got kicked out because I puked again I'm on the fire truck outside
WHY DO YOU ALWAYS PUT THE PLUG IN THE SINK BEFORE YOU PUKE IN IT
Kristy just reminded me that I have a bottle of champagne to lick off your ass hole...... This is by way of saying that we have plans on Friday.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Did you really just call a picture of your erect penis art?
She drunkenly dropped her ranch for her pizza. She tried to clean it up with her hands off the street then realized it didn't work and started licking her fingers.
I need you to ship me a penis cookie care package.
You are free to stop by. I promise to keep my penis in my leather pants
Remind me to NEVER AGAIN mix beer with tequila with beer with whiskey with vodka with rum with vodka.
Have you ever realized how weird it is to think that you've fucked someone and don't know what their handwriting looks like?
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