People are allowed to visit it's just they can't be from Germany and have to wear masks.
If I die tonight, wear a V neck to my funeral.
I think we should go ahead and pin a note to my shirt when we go out that says"do NOT buy me shots"
On the back we can put possible side effects may include: indiscriminate making out, brief crying spells, yelling in jibberish, and sudden sleep.
Is it wierd that I kind of wish I could hang out with Melissa Joan Hart?
Nothing screams don't date me louder then having your baby as your profile pic
Sorry, can't come over. I have to spend time with my niece. Her Dad ignores her and I don't want her to have male attention issues like you.
Almost thought it was a good idea to call his parents to thank them for having a son with an awesome dick. That high.
I wish I could go about my daily activities with his dick inside me
Cassie is wearing a baseball cap. This rebound is going nowhere
You left me a voice message at 5 a.m. It was mostly incoherent noise, you screaming my name and then something about a man with two butt holes...
WE SHOULD MAKE A WORKOUT ROUTINE CALLED BARCARDIO
I've started drunk signing up for 5ks. Who even does that?
Wait, cocaine is okay but tanning isn't?
Thanks for being the best husband and reassuring my fuck buddy that you're comfortable with my adultery. You da real MVP.
KY in my mouth and throat does not a party make.
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