If I go to jail what happens to my debt?
You dont have to pay it.
I'm going to jail.
You drinking a lot?
No.
Define a lot
I just woke up in the coolest sweatsuit i have ever seen..it has cory's name on the tag...do we know a cory?
this islike a room full of reasons why i should be in prison
I hit him with a car. Nothing says I hate you more than backing into someone with a fucking car.
I action rolled over a firepit. Twice. I am the action roll king
I'm eating cheerios out of the palm of my hand while I pee with the door open. Is this adulthood?
I hope you realize that its not me making that decision, but rather the combination of my genitals and sexual orientation
When we were finished I asked him how long it had been since he'd cum that hard. He thought really hard for a while before telling me his brain forgot how years worked.
He specifically said I couldn't post the picture of him passed out naked except for a strategically placed washcloth. Where's the fun in that?
YOU'RE MARRIED. TO OTHER PEOPLE.
Okay so it turns out that my bf keeps a log of every time I sleep-fart. It's dated back to 2013.
He called me Kitten either just because or he figured out my old s&m life. Either way huge turn on.
I got wine drunk and bought a hedgehog.
The reason why I poison my organs is so that you guys can't sell them.
i think i just naturally attract stoners
Randomize
