I have funfetti in my underwear...will you come get me?
he has a girlfriend so we used my stuffed animals to pretend to have sex
hahaha our party bus just died on the freeway and we're drinking in the center divider. i'm on the roof. i win
For some reason fuck navy didn't go over quite as well as say fuck michigan;
She woke up 3 seperate times, each time she had a look of pure terror on her face, she had no clue where she was.
BIGGER SANDWIJH COME NIW OR DIE
He just keeps repeating "this isn't my bagel".. i'm worried for his safety
Snuck into a camper in someone's yard. Hotboxing. Can't wait until they go in it.
Watching the tv in the reflection of my phone cause I'm too hungover to roll over.... Yes it is 4 PM...
I believe I can fly has to be one of the most inspirational songs of our time. Seriously R. Kelly nailed it
Then he went and peed on those teenagers.
It's a sexual break up. We maintain a friendship and leave any and all sexual attraction out. It's not hard, having a baby is harder than that.
She's so high she just screamed into the pile of takeout boxes "which one of you gave me diarrhea"
Like he was trying to be sexy but he had shit taste in porn so i left
I woke up next to a box of cheese bread it was super romantic
I cant believe you bit her ass cheek, she must have been really weirded out.
yeah so we made out to make it less awkward
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