I do no wrong. I am always right. Right? I forget why I am sending this. It seemed relevant.
The cops found weed in michael jacksons house today...it makes up for the child molesting, I like him more now.
I just woke up. In the port-o-potty next to our tailgate. an hour after the game started. explain.
note to self... there IS such a thing as having too many birthday shots...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
And then he told me he just wanted me to hold his cock while we watched tv...
That rando I gave head to on the beach just endorsed me on LinkedIn for Oral Communication Skills. So there's that.
It was a shot marathon. It only ended because we werent drinking in our house apparently we walked into the nieghbors. When they got home thy were soooooo pissed.
he just used a semicolon in the middle of a sext
Was I drunk or did Alex not show up with 100 rainbow Jell-O shots?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I ask him how he's going, like life and stuff, and he responds "20-0 pats"
only i would get off to receiving death threats online
Just got the test results back; apparently I'm red-green colorblind. this explains the past 18 years of my life and i'm wondering why i didn't realize this sooner
How many Hail Marys does a girl need to say to get some quality nudes?
I saw some guy masturbating in the Burger King parking lot and I’m just fucking done
my favorite sex position is the one where no sex actually happens we just get really stoned and eat a lot and watch netflix in the dark
Randomize