the clerk said it was the first time she had ever seen someone walk in the next day to return the tux still wearing the tux
No, you dont understand, he literately fucked me into a new hairstyle, quite nice too.
Some guy seriously just got Jimmy Johns delivered to him at the graduation ceremony. This cannot be real life.
i wish his balls had a scratch and sniff sticker elsewhere so i would know before i even went down there
next time we drink: battle shots.
battle shots or battle shits? if its the first, explain. if its the second I think I figured it out.
WHY IN THE FUCK DID YOU LET ME DRUNK PUNCH STEVE? HE IS SUCH A NICE GUY!
her spring break bucket list included "break into The Swamp, blow him where Tebow has Tebowed"
And the cockring thing wasn't sexual.
I just farted and its sounded like it was disappointed in me.
You're an idiot. I have LIVED as a cautionary tale of what happens when you drink too much and stick your dick in crazy, HAVE YOU LEARNED NOTHING?
Like if it it's practical for your sexual health I'm allergic to it AKA REGULAR CONDOMS
Im playing a game I have to take a drink every time my gram asks me the same question hammered by 4 guaranteed
My vagina is the only part of me that is pleased you lived through last night.
hey, cheif big dick, where the fuck are my panties.
I dont know which is weirder.. the fact that i just watched our mom kick ass at beer pong and ride the pole like a true fire girl or the fact that ive never felt closer to her in my life.
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