I hate ducks.
What?
they're sketch. like squirrels. squirrels are sketch as fuck.
The jonas brothers playing in your laptop. This is why guys won't sleep with you...
I asked her if she watches the office. She said no, but do you watch I'm a celebrity get me outa here? That's when i knew. Deal breaker
I wonder if they've ever made a porno about the song "she'll be comin' round the mountain when she comes"
Now you know why i just sit on the toilet and scream
Just heard the new 'We are the world' ... Can I get my 10 bucks for Haiti back?
A relator touring our house this week saw the picture in our bathroom of steven passed out, yellow faced, with BALLS on his forehead, and had to ask "if that kid was alive or dead".
You get to witness red pubes. I'm almost jealous. That's like my dream.
he tried to breastfeed my turtle
The beers last night were like the tears from god
you had acid sex with the barista. why is my bucket list your tuesday?
Oddly enough I feel totally fine now. Clonazapam and red bull the breakfast of champions.
But I mean how many guys can say they get blow jobs and grilled cheese with football
dropping lines from Workaholics has slowly become my icebreaker when hitting on girls. who would have thought "lets get weird" would cause girls to actually get weird
It's so Britney 2007, you know?
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