Her cum face looks like the large marge scene in pee-wees big adventure
watching law and order svu marathons. all of the sex crimes cases start like my sat night.
This house was built for laser tag.
she asked me which thongs i though her boyfriend would like best. fuck the friend zone
I should go buy the economy size box of condoms and sprinkle a path like rose petals to my bed... Think he'd get the hint?
I caught him trying to shit in her bed. I asked him why he was doing it and he said "because it's wrong."
The rest of us are chipping in to soundproof your bedroom. This is getting ridiculous.
You beat him at the shot competition, and proceeded to rub it in while telling everyone to "ASK ME A MATH QUESTION!!!"
don't say the first was when I crawled under into the dressing room
to instagram or to not instagram the picture i took of when i shit in the urinal
what i'd really like is a nice helping of naked boyfriend with a side of naked boyfriend.
I spent last night dying strippers pubes green and landscaping shamrocks. That is why hands look like I squashed a leprechaun.
I was out of weed and my vibrator broke, so I'm now at Red Lobster.
I have to stay away from bourbon. Despite what it keeps telling me, it is NOT my friend.
thanks for letting me have sex in your bed, too bad you didn't get to yet
who are you?
Randomize
