at the bar. watching boys pee in urinals. when they come out we give them a thumbs up or a thumbs down. probbb shouldn't prop the bathroom door open with a bar stool....
Can you explain my first weekend back, because there a lot of blacked out gaps and 32 friend requests i would like to know about
Do you think my job would send me for a second drug test if i took a whole pumpkin pie to work for lunch tomorrow?
I didn't know how to tell her I was too busy getting stoned and making a baked potato to meet up and finish our group project.
I am "lost the control of my head" high right now.
Tried to land my foot on his shoulder and kicked him in the face. Then I fell into a homeless man's bike and posed with a buffalo head. How was your night?
Its was awkward last year cuz in the middle of it her mom bust In the room with noise makers and champagne
strip teases shouldnt end with an expensive car covered in salsa and mayonnaise yet here we are
It's a beautiful day to be high as fuck
I am passing the whore torch on to you my friend. Do me proud
I don't get promposals. When I asked my date I was so drunk I couldn't lift my head. Then I puked on my lawn after he said "ok whatever". That's romance
I wrote myself a note last night telling me to tell you that you're the best person ever, and asking you not to tell me what I did, I think I'm trusting my drunk judgment on that one.
Me and some guy are crying in a port a potty together after another guy broke up with both of us.
OMG OMG OMG I just throwed up in his pillow case when he wentto start the sho wer, time to grab my bra and bounce!!!
Wow.
i have a serious question for you... Why I am i not wearing any pants?
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