escape the fate? dumbest band name ever. how about escape the fart. now that is a show i would go see!
the next morning i told him i was impressed that he remembered my name. he said it wasn't that hard when "tracy
You are colorful like whore, yet adorable, like sad puppy. You need more drink.
Sorry about blasting sandstorm on a loop when i left for work this morning. But maybe this will teach you to not come home trashed on a tuesday night with some chick and have loud sex till 4 in the morning. The walls are thin, remember?
True. I'd rather snort cocaine off a homeless guy then work on the weekend...Actually that may not be that bad.
Oh I already celebrated valentine's day. I stayed up until 4 AM listening to biggie, drinking rum, and caressing all my girl curves in front of the mirror. And then I came 3 times.
Correct me if I'm wrong, but did you let me pee in the grass while barking? And also, how many of you have videos?
the manischevitz sangria was a big hit
walk of shame. I'm wearing my rain jacket over my dragon costume. My tail keeps dragging in the rain.
She throws back shots like they are NO-THING. I swear, she goes through like five straight tequila shots, does a jello shot, chases with half a hot dog, has a rum and coke, and then takes her shirt off and makes an impromptu bandage out of it for fuckin' Tim who cut himself on the flagpole. I'm going to marry her.
My boobs are literally freaking out because I've been wearing a bra for more than three hours....I need to go out more...
Did you put Adderal in the fishtank in the lobby? The fish are acting like Olympic sprinters. Asshole.
I don't know what the hell I'm going to do with myself when this is all over. I'll probably just go back to smoking pot and trying to learn italian.
Best and worst whiskey dick ever. I am hungover and can't move from the hours of sex, he on the other hand has a raw bruised dick. I win.
He’s disease free and drives a Porsche. What else does a girl need?
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