So #1 way to come back last night and #2 wishbone and I broke into his house and i opened joey's door and u were both passed out and pantless.
just heard some guy walking down the street say "butt sex in the sun"
go get him tiger.
The bridesmaids just went smackdown on the floor, over the bouquet. I saw nipple. Best wedding ever
It was odd. His friends dick tasted the same as his. Friends are beginning to have to much in common
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She's more than welcome to come too, so long as she has gotten over that me being responsible for the death of her cat thing.
I feel like a fucked a broomstick last night. You get a gold star.
My boyfriend correctly calculated the time I would be out of alcohol and showed up about four minutes after I'd run out with two bottles of wine. I think this is love.
Maybe I'm just didn't notice and imagined a different penis as a Freudian coping mechanism?
Id fuck him but only at his house and he had to stay im bed till i left. He only works upper body. It just creeps me out how tiny his legs are
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I tell you, MacGyver never had to put up with people shitting themselves while he worked...
Remember that time I hopped home naked from the bar, then tried to convince you I was ok to drive you home? Good call on the taxi.
Being a slave to ur dick is exhausting.
There's a quesaritto in the oven. Neither of us have been to Taco Bell in 3 weeks.
Fun fact. I just wrapped myself in wrapping paper for a sext. Is this a new high or a new low stay tuned.
Pretty sure this radio station is run by a cult. Good thing it's in Spanish, can't brainwash someone who can't understand you.
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