used his ipod to set the mood...1st song was livin on a prayr 2nd song was disco stick
i expected more from guys that i meet at the jersey shore.
He wouldnt get hard, then started talking about his ex wife. I literally rolled over and started to cry
we sat in the hammock and pretended we were skydiving for three hours. jack actually started crying when i convinced him his chute didnt open.
he told me my hair look so beautiful and as he was stroking it his fingers got caught in my BUMPIT. How are you supposed to explain that one?
just got my girl scout cookies. wanna get high?
Fun fact: Antibacterial soap will not take the combined smell of bbq sauce and vagina off your hands.
You better be watching. There will be a POP quiz. Each correct answer gains you 5 more minutes of the sexual act of your choice
they call him Oral-B. enough said
He's like my sex unicorn. Elusive and majestic. I'll catch him, I'm baiting with patron.
I just picked up a hitchhiker so karma will be on our side this weekend. Hahahahahaha
No.
And then I fed you egg rolls in bed as you were screaming I'm moving out
what i'd really like is a nice helping of naked boyfriend with a side of naked boyfriend.
Fuck that, come home. Let's get drunk and judge people.
He told me I was "too flexible." Excuse me?
It's like the cookie assaulted me with being high.
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