I wonder if they've ever made a porno about the song "she'll be comin' round the mountain when she comes"
I just rubbed my dick on something in your apartment. Can you guess what?
i lose more brain cells when ever she opens her mouth then i would doing meth for 8 years of my life.
Its important to me that you know there is a tambourine down my pants.
How external is "for external use only"?
Also, I'm going to TRY and be casual this weekend, but really, we need to be serious about equally dividing our time between party and bullshit.
I cannot even describe to you the most amazing ass I have ever had the pleasure of seeing walk up the stairs in front of me just now.
i was sitting in the back of a squad car completely stoned watching airplanes take off
He told me we shouldn't hang out because it would be weird and then snap chatted me a picture of his dick
He is currently passed out on his toilet. Point day drinking.
I don't even care that it's before church. I feel like God actually wants me to have this shower beer.
Pants are for mortals
I was not drunk. There was Star Wars, sex, and baby oil.
Caitlin, you were laying in your bed feeding your dog ritz chips and singing a whole new world at 4am loud enough your neighbors came over an asked you to stop.
I love my life
its Niagara falls. its like international waters. You can get away with anything there
Randomize