I just pulled the condom that i lost on tues out of me at work ewwww!
just got a hand job during a movie in class today is gonna be great!
She called herself a train and then took off all her clothing. I forget everything after that.
I saw you two flinging Jello at the sidewalk if that helps jog your memory.
He must be back home now. He moved his box of beer from her porch to ours.
He threw up in the campfire, the alcohol in his puke caught on fire. Im marrying this man
Within 24 hours, I went to a feminist documentary screening with two state reps and you hate fucked a rent-a-cop on the helipad of your hospital. Somewhere our lives went in different directions.
I still make more money.
so I am that guy with the red solo cup in class. someone has to step it up.
its like i had a thought but i dont know what the words are for it
My roomate has me out looking for easter kegs hidden arround town
Note to self: trying to grow pubes back = worst decision of 2014 thus far
the cashier at the gas station pulled a twig out of my hair and told me I should probably wash it before work....it was kinda sweet.
But for real though. That weed tastes like the jolly laughter of Santa Claus.
sorry for running off in the middle of that heart to heart. free food.
Omg my orgasm just made the fucking sun come out. Clearly my libido controls the weather now.
How much beer/TP for a BJ? Trying to set my new rates.
Randomize
