my dad wants uyo to call him right now...reverse drunk dialing
no morals, dignity, or self respect ... just an empty condom wrapper and a facebook request
Considering he believes im part of the 2016 us curling team id say hes pretty drunk
I remember sucking his bleeding finger and then it's all black until he had his hand down my pants.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Dude just read our convo. Apparently I was talking to you while I was naked. She wasn't happy about it.
we were bear claw grabbing his crotch in the middle of the bar yelling prominent ridge over and over.
As if right now I am a humanitarian. Full story to come in the morning. It involves sex.
Notice how both of our plans for hooking up with these guys involve getting them drunk?
Oh my God, we're like men but with great boobs.
The part of "Dave" will now be played by "Rob." Rob, why don't you unzip and show Dave why that is.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I asked Tony because I knew he wouldn't give me a lecture about consequences
???? Tony IS a lecture about consequences
But can mardi gras accurately capture the essence of my tiny rage?
I wonder if my sister will drive me around while I do bong hits in the back seat..
The tamale guy is fucking with me, I wanna sleep in he wakes me up; early wake-n-bake and he's late and I'm hungry
I don't remember that much at all. But I guess I met this guy from New Zealand and his dog, and then I punched someone in the face.
3 hour lecture of my biology teacher talking about isotopes and space shuttles. I'm way too high for this.
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