Oh i forgot. I hit on a mentally challenged girl too.
some girl had on jean underwear. i hate america.
State Street has never looked so beautiful than during my walk of shame.
I got 70 on my final, or put differently, I got a "still graduating" on my final.
She's gonna be fat in the future. On a side note I had a "It's not you, it's me." conversation with a bottle of jack last night.
You walked in with a firecracker and a doughnut then demonstrated what a lazy job he did fucking you
I feel like I took a shit on my life and you're rubbing my nose in it.
Probably twitter. Never underestimate a psycho girl with wifi
we tried to exchange flip flops in the parking lot and fell over then army crawled home
Bobbing for jello shots in a bucket of long island. Fast track to alcohol poisoning.
As a general rule of thumb, I don't call until the claw marks have healed.
My glasses were in the garbage this morning
PS if you want to hear something hilarious as my little sister was showing me her engagement ring I open a Snapchat from R and it's literally a dick pic. Very different points in our life
He was publicly touching my boobs before I even knew he's a famous World Cup skier.... That's how hot he was
Unless you want to see me masturbate, I think skype is a no go for now.
Randomize
