his cum shot went directly into his bellybutton. felt like i was playin ski ball
I try to help out whenever I can. Speaking of rough nights I woke up half naked on Brady's couch with bloody paper towels duct taped to my foot.
Not gonna lie i was comfortable between the allsups air conditioners while you were talking to the cop.
Who topped off the "random beer mix" beer bong with a pinch of pepper?? All you could taste was busch and pepper...
Did you just buzz the apartment and throw shit at the window? Josh and rob came into my room and woke me up
Fuck you Ian. U owe me $3.65 cuz thasts what I thfrew at ur window trying to wake ur ass up. And fuck u for not giving a shit
he found cum stains on my sheets and all i could blurt out was "better on the sheets than in me"
We bonded over the fact that we each, separately, got arrested on the same weekend.
I am just saying if Clark Kent walks into your life, you fuck him
Locals got pissed I was talking to the barmaid. Tried to tell me that they keep all the good beer at "a Soho walkup" Google saved me
So his 25th anniversary post of love to his wife was almost verbatim what he said to me last week. Does that mean I win or lose?
We grabbed as many adult diapers as we could and made a run for it.
And, omg, my eyelids are on fire. I think the internet let me down. :(
I refuse to be socially acceptable any longer than what is needed to pick up chinese food.
my friends roomated asked me this morning if we went to mcdonalds last night and i had no idea...that is until i checked my purse and found half a mcdouble in it...
I Never thought my late 30s would end up with me getting eaten out on a desk in the managers office of a lululemon, but I guess being a franchise owner has its perks!
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