That guy youre talking to looks like Brian from Family Guy.
Best moment of my life. I just got a text from some random number that said i can't wait to touch you. Her name is kiara and she had the wrong number.
we just did breakfast shots, I have a black eye and savage garden is on . Best weekend ever
He managed to light the Jello on fire...
smelt my brothers hands when he got home to see if he lied about smoking again...he didn't lie but i definitely didn't expect to smell some other girls vagina.
can you explain how you are here for one night and now my kitchen table is in 11 pieces..
Did you pluck my eyebrows one night when I passed out?
The kid that passed out is still in the bathtub filled with ice and the empties
hey dude come in here and see how much of my beard i can put in my mouth!
Fuck a-yeah! I just found a wine key. Let 'Don't Fuck With Me Friday' commence.
You know it's last call at a gay bar when the guys at the urinal are just jacking off in front of each other. Most awkward pissing moment of my life.
So is there a reason your dad is passed out naked in my shower? P.S. Congrats on the family dong.
I didn't get it..
I'm sorry. But to the original question please.
No, just kidding. But your faith in me to throw a lesbian bridal shower makes me think I an pull it off. To the LGBT bar!
I woke up uncovered, spread eagled to my dad saying "you really need to stop sleeping naked."
Look, I am sorry I shaved your cat...but get over it.
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