After they won there was a guy outside Magee Hospital yelling "name your kid Sidney"... that guy may or may not have been me.
I don't remember her name, but I do remember yelling at her from the balcony of the hotel room during her walk of shame.
There's a girl in here wearing a kaballah bracelet and a miley Cyrus tshirt. consider her judged.
He told me about his girlfriends trust issues during our post sex spooning
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Coming home soaking wet at three am and trying to convince the front desk man that we came from the library might have worked if I wasn't also roaring at everything.
there has got to be a maximum amount of semen a person can take in before they get some kind of poisoning.
im standing in line right now while the 711 manager calls other locations to see if they have the john cena collectors slurpee cup in stock...yep i need to get laid
I don't know if I should be scared or excited that I can officially drink vodka on the rocks like it's 7up.
You need to let me be on top sometimes. I gotta get rid of these love handles
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
at the end of the day, college isnt gonna be for everyone... and some of us are just going to have to learn how to breathe underwater while sucking cock.
When he gets asked "is it in?" more than his name you arent missing out on much more than a petite tampon.
Happiness was finding the hidden Gatorade in the fridge
he signed me a blank check so today i get to decide if i want to be a saint or a millionaire
Was banging my ex last night when his roommate walked in... We kept going. #goaheadandwatch
someone at the bars was yelling at the bouncer to let him in because he "just passed through the 7 levels of the candy cane forrest" soulmate?
go meet him and give him your number.
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