So I just watched the Lakers/Magic game so I could have something to talk about with him after we have sex this time
don't ever try to run hungover. just puked mid-run in front of an old couple that were going for a walk. they were horrified.
strippers are much less mysterious after you sleep with them
sounds like it. if it makes you feel better i blew up a $75000 farm tractor last night.
I just threw up again because I opened my eyes... God is laughing. I resorted to taking the Mexican Dramamine because I feel seasick from walking. Not helping.
Attempting to sleep without a bra since i got my nips pierced wish me luck. Also almost sent that to my coworker.
EW HE JUST SNAPPED ME A NUDE BUT HE CENSORED HIS DICK BY COLORING IT I DID NOT ASK FOR THIS
I didnt finish. My brain kept playing the duck tales theme thru the entire blow job
you guys have a strange definition of the word fun. I would have said dangerous, terrifying, or life-threatening. of course, bowling can now be described the same way.
I'm all set for mothers day, I let her beat me in beer pong.
I just accidentally deep throated a popsicle in front of my parents
I want to see a guy holding a pizza and a bottle of scotch and a box of magnums. I'm a simple woman.
That falls under the "unwelcome penises" category. Also that's definitely a sentence I never thought I would say
I feel like ditching all logic and responsibility and get shit-faced before the week's over. Thoughts?
i bet he makes cat noises to excite himself.
Randomize
