last night i found where hot topic managers go to die after they get fired.
just found more coke in my pocket. i love not washing my jeans after every individual use.
Any girl that compares her vag to a hot ham sandwich is beyond a slut
you were crying because peter frampton wasnt your dad
just found my diary from when i was 14. i demand a drinking game of this.
The mass text at 3:12AM offering "free scrotum tastings" will have repercussions
I am planning my day around naps and lesbians.
dude you need a shock collar for some of the things you say when you're drunk.
Please high five our old drug dealer for me please.
Hahahaha who is sleeping in the garage on our beer pong table?
Oh yeah, found out i got it from my boyfriend's wife. Thanks though.
He was making Jim beam nachos. Chips soaked in whiskey with cheese
JUST DENIED A NEW YEARS KISS BECAUSE HE WAS A COWBOYS FAN.
We broke the bed while I was handcuffed to the headboard and let's just say that was a hard one to explain to the RA
HE’S PUKING UP BLOOD
okay all good I mistook strawberita for blood...
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