Spotted at kelly concert- 10 year old in a homemade "I do not hook up" t shirt. Well I should certainly hope not, sweetheart.
so far i wrote 500 words for a paper on sean paul performing we be burnin..i can officially do anything on adderral
you kept yelling at her to "show me your genitals" until the bouncers told us to leave...at which point you showed them YOUR genitals...
please don't ever take me to a strip club again...
After a valiant attempt at golf, I think it's time for Tiger to go back to doing what he does best- having sex w/ blond, white women.
This glow in the dark vibrator will get me through this power outage
I was going to call you an awful person for that. but then i realized we're both awful people.
Really* awful people.
Thanks for putting pants on me last night. And for calling me a princess.
Either call me back or tell me you're in jail. For fucks sake. If this is a cop, just help out. national league.
Ohh man do you know how awkward it is to keep eye contact and have a normal conversation with someone while their hand is in your vagina?
Looking forward to meeting the person naked and passed out at my kitchen table.
The joke is on me because whale penis is forever in my search history.
Worth it.
the police report says i screamed sanctuary from a jungle gym at the playground when they caught up with us, obviously they disregarded international law.
I have 13 missed calls from when I slept outside on some rocks
It was great. We stayed up all night talking about objects he'd put in his theoretical vagina.
I'd like to thank Vicodin for getting me through family thanksgiving once again.
Randomize
