no, he's only a walking dick if he mans up. right about now he's just a walking transgender.
I bet a guy could be masturbating under the table now and people would just think he was clapping along.
I just saw a man vacuming his front lawn. What is this world coming to?
fter the third song from an iPod commercial played I realized how much that frat sucked.
I feel so grown up. I just went to home depot to buy actual home improvement supplies instead of stuff to make a bong with.
Just hit on a fat chick so shed buy me a drink. Then i walked away. Nice to see how the other half lives.
Guy passed out in the lobby with a keychain sharpie hanging from his belt loop. 1 guest came in and wrote on him, then others saw and got in line. I'm not waking him up.
Actually, you don't want to see me.. reached an all time low drinking kahlua out of the bottle concealed in a macdonalds bag
Well, I tried to shit into my refrigerator. It was a rough night.
I was grinding on people that were grinding. Nonconsensual.
She is the Michael Jordan of blowjobs. Unfortunately, her baby sister is the Michael Jordan of baseball of blowjobs. It does not run in the family.
Dude. Photoshop a Santa hat on your mug shot and send it as your Christmas cards.
he just cleaned his wound with pinnacle whipped
My hair tie broke, stole my one-night stands daughters pink sparkly one. BEST hair-tie I have ever used...
Imma go take shower so I can cleanly change into my drinking underwear.
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