Call me "white mamba"
Your dick is not a dangerous deadly poisonous snake
It is white.
it was like she wanted to be a once a week night stand
I am too high to leave where I am...And they are listening to Stained. This is my living hell.
If you bang a chick other than your girlfriend while playing tiger woods on xbox I wonder if an accomplishment would come up...
I seriously just washed my dick in a public restroom. That's how dirty last night got
the party was called freshmen disorientation. i was just following the theme
Can't show you right now as we are in public and he refuses to let me photograph his penis in a bar.
Anne I just took two ambiens. I think my body is melting into my blow up bed. Like a stick of butter just slowly melting. And I'm alright. Don't be afraid. I'll be alright.
Received a verbal warning at work for "riding in a trash receptacle, violating professionalism & infection control."
How do you explain to a guy that he's like a little puppy dog that you play with, but then leave at the shelter to go home to your German Shepard?
There a special place in hell for drunk criers. A special FUCKING PLACE
We're fucking and Lee Greenwood God Bless the USA comes on and he came. It was the most Roll Tide America moment of my life.
My body is telling me there was tequila. My pictures say it was Jeff's fault
No matter how many miles separate us, I will always be here to get you through whiskey shots.
Have you ever realized how weird it is to think that you've fucked someone and don't know what their handwriting looks like?
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