Ha i know. My vag can't go too crazy for a boy halfway across the country. It doesn't have that good of range
it felt like I walked into a Tool Academy challenge
she passed out facedown in my lap while I was playing piano. 11 years of piano lessons finally paid for themselves.
I cleaned out the fridge, had to pound the brews. I am going to be wrecked for my final at 1
Then you started screaming that this was the first time you did e and that you had a 4.8 gpa, that was right before you almost suffocated between that one girl's tits.
You kept showing everyone at the bar your bra to prove it matched your shoes.
I thought you just gave him blowjobs and he criticized your drug use.
Im gunna just be that one ballerina in the low V leopard thong leotard and everyone else can be boring and prude with their little pink tights on.
They are the perfect team. One always has weed, the other always has cigarettes. They're like the Batman and Robin of drugs
he literally referred to his penis as the alaskan bull worm from spongebob. when can we get married
So, I'm about to take my pants off in the Walmart parking lot, when am old lady parks next to me. I'm all the way in the back next to the semis. What the hell?
It's volleyball. Just do it. You want to look sporty. Save sexy librarian for another day.
Your skill with memes is vaguely frightening
She turned off her phone alarm (which was the theme song to Star Wars) and then asked me if I wanted a blow job before she went...of course I am going to see her again.
He can be a kind, caring soul but also give in to the temptation of eating unicorn ass.
Randomize
