My professor really needs to stop abbreviating. I'll never remember what "Fun. Anal. Trade-offs?" means when i study.
Lady with a stroller in a bar. Think she's out of my league?
we made margaritas with slurpies from 7-11 and beer.
So I was throwing up in this fancy toilet at a party last night, when he decided it would be funny to flush it. It was a beday. I had to walk out with toilet water and regurgitated rumpleminze all over my face and shirt.
he puked in my glove box, looked up at me and said "There's not much to say"
officially christened the dorm room by sucking my spilled drink off the floor. tastes like homee
Yes. I feel like complaining about sex all the time with a 21 year old might be punishable by death of the sex gods so I try not to
No more cocaine. I spent two hours in my bathroom convincing myself I was ugly. Is this what a period feels like?
You're the worst gay friend ever.
One day. I will touch his hair. I'm curious if it'll be like a soft cloud.
Moonshine marathon is never a good idea
I know it sounds all cute and shit that I wanted him to be with me last night, but it's not cute. I just wanted to fuck.
It's simple. He fucks me at his place and I fuck him at my place. It's like man of the house gets to top.
Nothing too major over here lately. Just had a date with an ex-internet porn star turned lawyer. He said: "at my 3rd burning man I taught a workshop on BDSM" and I knew it was going to be a fun night.
His dick is curly. It's adorable.
OMG WE ARE UP TO THREE MINORS WORKING HERE. I AM NOT READY FOR THIS MID LIFE CRISIS.
Randomize
