Me too!
She said she didn't think she should have to shave either. Guess no shave November just became no sex November.
Have $25 to my name but it's $2 pitchers. I have no choice but to go.
Hey its the Filipino guy from last night. I just wanted to say sorry my friend bled all over your driveway. Great party though.
Are you really this nice or are you just trying to get in my pants?
Both?
Is it weird that out of everything, Im most worried about chipping a tooth on his prince albert?
You used up your allotted blow job minutes for the month of April last night anyways
Found a popcorn kernel in my pubes... Time fir a Brazilian
Don't worry, the house smells like waffles more than sex
Dude, you flipped off a cat from my balcony and yelled at it to get a house
He told me I have nice nipples. You can't just tell someone that and then leave the state!
1) Woke up alone with my bathing suit on inside out spooning an empty bottle of Jack, 2) get the fuck on to my level 3) please pick me up and bring a stuffed pony, some Oreo's and my pride...
Wait, how many people just saw my dick?
Dad literally changed the channel from an episode of Big Bang Theory to another episode of Big Bang Theory. That's why I hate this show.
short story short, i just screamed anal seepage in the middle of a diner.
Randomize