So his roomate was eating breakfast when I was sneaking out. He's the guy I took home from jessicas wedding. I ended up eating coco puffs with him
Just another sign I need to get out of this town
apparently i started the naked brigade. and depantsed everyone who wasn't naked. her parents must hate me.
she's got that wholesome 16 and pregnant look.
worst night to have a conscience
Don't leave without me in the morning. I keep scaring everyone cause I'm sleeping in the bathtub.
They call it the Collection Couch because all 4 room mates have slept with at least 3 different girls on it. He tried to seal the deal with "would you like to be number 14?"
And sadly I did.
just served this dwarf dude an entire pitcher of malt liquor. watching this will totally be worth my bartender's certification.
You brought out the iron board layed it on the ground in the middle of everyone and passed out for the night
In chronological order you drank, sang, smoked, napped, threw up, cried, laughed, described your pubic area, passed out. You have abused the privilege to use me as your D.D.
Yes. I am getting trashed on an open tab while judging a karoke competition
Impressive. I approve.
I have just been informed that my company has ray guns. I WORK FOR ACTUAL BOND VILLAINS. THIS IS NOT A DRILL.
If last night was a preview of 2015, I quit.
Considering all of my stomach contents ended up in my center console, I'm a bit peckish.
Only I could turn my one night stands into class essays. Go me.
I know it's New Year's Eve but if you're going to have a bunch of chicks playing strip go fish in our apartment I need a heads up.
Randomize
