Just left a map of the Aleutian islands on this Eskimo girls face. Check one off my Alaska to do list.
My number went up to seventeen today. I forgot to add my random hookup on a sailboat.
there are so many fish in the see you have left to fuck
Just made macaroni burritos. Fukkin awesome. We'll have to try this when I'm sober.,!
I'm scared to see what happens if we keep winning like this. I don't think there enough livers for every one after the season is over.
I might have hooked up with a 2003 alumni last night in the basement
Dude you were ten when he graduated
Wahoowaaaaaaa
Filthy. I need to be power hosed with holy water.
I just offered a cat a "drinky drinky" I'd say my night has started
I had wine for breakfast at 6am, that's how visiting my parents went.
I don't think you should say "suck my dick" and then proclaim to be a messiah, of any sort.
she paid $15 and a box of cheerios for their acid
idk i usually just blame everything on steve
Steve quit two months ago
I just want to hook up with Ed Sheeran. Why does it have to be so difficult?
So... I sharted on the plane. It was hard to maintain my composure and acted offended at the same time. I hate you for not cutting me off last night.
I love you.
Bad choice
Randomize
