If he comes back to you and I'm left alone in lonelytown I'm totally going to poo on your car.
Hold on, I'm google imaging "vagina close ups" to see if mine match up
last time i saw her she was begging the broken jukebox to play lady gaga.
Her face just looks like a massive mistake. That's the only legitimate description I can say about it
Knowing that he goes to voodoo every Thursday really makes me want to get myself checked.
I have a very hazy flashback of me making out with a guy in a seashell bra??! Can you confirm or deny
I just feel like you're using me for sex.
I'm glad you finally understand the context of our relationship
New BDSM fun fact. When you get spanked hard enough with a flat object, you get welts. Welcome to thunderdome, bitches.
I'm just gonna use that pot butter as dip for chips. That's fat, American AND stoner!
We're over by the bouncy castles. I'm the one wearing a baby. Bring Twizzlers.
No foreplay. Missionary. Too quick. And he owns a fedora.
I almost fell asleep reading that.
I almost fell asleep fucking it.
Ew. He is mine. We all know that if he has a mid-life crisis and decides to sleep with a student, I AM THAT STUDENT. She's not friends with him on FB. Reassuring.
gonna stay in tonight
and im a platypus. shotgun a beer and get your dick to this party. ive got some hot friends visiting
I had such a bad bruise on my knees from blowing him so much, he asked if he could sign it...
she passed out standing next to the car. her head hit the door so hard the alarm went off. she instantly snapped out of it and started sprinting away
Randomize
