how do you tell a roommate that having sex on your bottom bunk is not appropriate even if she has a top bunk that's hard to climb to?
ISS teacher has a tramp stamp.
Shotgun.
No jewlry, no bra, and no pen. I couldnt be more prepared for a friday morning class.
in the morning i found her name, number and address on one of the empty pizza boxes. also said "ps. if you find my shoes please mail to me."
Based on her brazillian stubble I would guess her plan had been to wait one more date before sleeping with me. Seems the plan was flexible.
and this is why we should make december sharting awareness month.
i have a surprise for you that looks bigger since I found my body hair trimmer
The little girl I babysit saw pink plastic shot glasses in my car and asked what they were for and I told her they were princess teacups.
One good thing about being really drunk when you go out to dinner is that the leftovers are a surprise. These quesadillas had shrimp in them! Who knew?
Can we just cry and dive into a couch-sized bag of sadness-chips, dip them in a la-z-boy sized jar of depression salsa while watching a show called 'Forget Your Hopes and Dreams, Just Kill Yourself'?
I vaguely remember us chasing shots by licking each other's faces last night. Our friendship has reached another level completely.
I'm over being sad. I'm now onto thinking about all the ways in which he is a total fuckwaste
Its really hard to get off when the googly eyes on your vibrator stare into your soul..
Yeah you're weird. You once told me you would by me a house in the middle of sex. Like as you were thrusting.
Your ex spoke highly of your penis and it’s skill. I’m interested in learning more about it ;-)
Randomize
